The Crapzzz
Why must it be lyk this? Sumthing happy happened and next sumthing sad. This always happen... is this fate? F that guy who stole my hp, for ruining my night... I'm gonna miss u... Miss u alot... Why must human be so down, to steal? Can't they just work for it? The trophy means alot in the past but it dun seem so now. Nearly felt lyk throwing it. My mum still gotta add in to the wound... Haiz...
I'm gonna miss you... Every moment, every night...
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/22/2004 07:31:00 PM
I just a useless coward... I'm pathetic.... I''m just a coward and thta's me! I'm so useless!!!
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/18/2004 06:51:00 PM
Sigh... Sry dear! i'm reallllllly SRY!!! Aft that incident last sun, i learnt my lesson le and had been trying to be more sensitive so as nt to hurt ur feeling again but i did it this sun! Sigh... Sry... Can't seem to 4give myself. Knw it got sth to do wif me at Galilee when u lk so angry. A clue when u r angry is u wud say "wadeva" de. Though u r still angry, u still care abt me... Sry! How retard i'm when i still dunno wad i done wrong. How dumb i'm to realise u're angry wif me aft so long. How silly i'm to think i done nth wrong. Sry!!!
Feelings i can't stand:
1. Being left out
2. Sian
I wonder how many sry m i gotta say. I knw u're still cross for being so soft-hearted, for me being so insensitive. I'm gonna change... For the sake of u. I dun think i wud ever wanna love again. The whole cycle of love...
In deepest regrets... The person i'm fated to be wif... Dun leave me...
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/18/2004 05:34:00 PM
Yay!!! I DID IT! I GOT INTO TEAM! Muahaha... Feeling kinda excited and nervous now. First, C division wud be fighting against BPS but B division wud be facing RI. Which ever team lose this bout wud be out... GD luck to both divisions, especially B! Aww... Feel kinda sad for my friends- Yu don, Alvin and Joshy who train so so hard during the hols and didn't get to play. Guess Joshua and Yu Don wud be most affected by it. Josh dun lk in the right mind le.
Quite glad that my partner got in too... Due to his marvellous result for national individual! My friends is kinda building up the idea that he's better than me! lolz, m kinda jealous but nvm... He's my most understanding friend in SJI though. K, that's all...
~Deep in Love~ The flowers're blooming! Gd luck to SJI!!!
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/13/2004 08:00:00 PM
Geez, spend the whole of my sat at hougang sec. The estimated time for the comp to end was at 5 but it drag till 7+... i went off at 5.30 since our captain had dismissed us le. Went to junction8 to eat and on the way hm, we ran into our fellow judokas on the bus at 7+. Can't believe they actually stay till that time.
Overrall, SJI's performance was still acceptable. Got 3 bronze! 1 for each level. Guess it's SJI's fate to always get bronze? Come to think of it, our main rival is just RI and CHS, just beating 1 of them cud lead us to Finals le... Geez, gotta admit it, CHS's real gd... Got living legend in B division, and that nicholas in C... Ahh, Guess we can only aim to beat RI. Aww... Was hoping to see my captain clench gold de aft missing so many competition. Ahh, greed killed him... He cud have won his first bout but he chose to finish it out wif a beautiful throw. The rapper charge, he fought well but the ref cudn't figure out who to give the point to... Argh, Ref Kayu! He was so blur, shocked and disappointed when he knew he lost! So kelian... My partner Kai Xiang won his first trophy! Lolz, trng really help... Got this nervous feeling abt me screwing up in comp.
So fast the wk is over, 2more wks aft all the comp is over. Guess both of us deserve a break, ya? lolz, i feel lyk stuffing myself wif ice-cream! nvm...
That's all... Gd luck!
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/11/2004 10:34:00 AM
Gotten over my sad mood le... Guess it was just me thinking abt too much. Feeling kinda sweet now, dunno why. Though she prefer guys who can make her feel all kinda feelings, i made a promise to lev le tat i wun ever hurt her feelings! ^^ I made another promise that i wun get tired of my dear Sugar bear de! Lolz, can't really make this as promise but i'm gonna try being always there for her, cheering her up whenever she feels sad, encouraging her when she's in doubt...
"I'll be there for you..." Squall (Roy) LOLZ
Gonna be gtg to hougang sec early in the morning tmr. Ahh, my beauty slp. Gonna wake up at lyk 5.30. Gd Luck to SJI tmr! Especially my partner, Kai Xiang! Jia youz... Sir shud be annoucing the pple who r playing in team tmr. Hopefully i get in... Though my snrs all believe that i wud get in, i shudn't pull my hopes too high... Dun wanna be disappointed again lyk last time for age group. Geez, wonder wad wud i do if i really didn't get in. Nvm, I SHUD get in!!! Hail to SJI!!! =)
~lalila~ Kinda enjoying life now...
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/09/2004 07:48:00 PM
i feel sad... That i'm unable to make her feel fortunate/sweet nor happy. M i really that pathetic? Even Bryan who haven't even confessed to lev can make her feel so sweet but yet, i can't. She doesn't even feel that she's in love. Sigh... Tears had been gethering in my eyes this few days. Can't i just treasure this relationship and stop disappointing her?
I hate myself... I hate MYSELF!
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/05/2004 02:13:00 PM
I'm really really sry for spoiling your mood 2day... Sry...
I started doubting myself we r really suited. Loving sum1 is to give her happiness but i just think i can't do it... It's nt her fault, problems all lie on me. How do i make her happy? Seeing her sad make me feel both sad and bad... Sigh... ='(
Had quite a gd time watching spiderman... Strangly, i feel that both of us r quite quiet nowadays. M i running outta stuff to say? Why m i so pessimistic... wad's wrong wif me? Guess i shudn't doubt so much.
Most common ways i vent my anger/sianness/sadness
1. Take a breathe and blow it out loud
Fought a bout wif the guy who won me most of the times. Quite an achievement since i think he's the best player in sec2 now. Guess i wud be able to get into Team le... Got my new ph too. The camera graphic isn't that gd as samsung, i think. Sorta regretted... But nt much.
Guess i can understand spiderman's feelings, i guess... Since sumtimes, i'm in his position. Nvm, m just crapping. Sigh...
Soaring thr the lonely streets... Alone, seperated from the real world...
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/04/2004 06:36:00 PM
Yesterday was considered quite okay except in the morning. Selfishness is all others care abt. Went to play bball yesterday afternoon. Aiya, long time nv play de so my skills is getting worse. Kp missing my shots... Since yesterday was youth day, by paying $2, u wud be able to wear wadeva u wan. Sum1 did pay and they wore CHIJ uniform! LOLZ, CROSSDRESSER! Went around the sch during recess lking for them in their class. In the end, i saw none. Ahhh, m dying to meet 1 of them...
Gotta be getting my new ph 2day. Sony T630!!! YAY YAY! Lolz, first yay is b'coz i'm getting my dream ph! 2nd yay is b'coz i can finally sms -sum1-. =) Feel bad making her spend time talking on the ph wif me. Sry...
Guess that's all... Still got pathetic trng later and my calf muscle is still tense up frm yesterday morning. Ahh, hope my jnr dun kill me... lolz, C'yaz
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/03/2004 10:01:00 AM
Thx Kai Xiang, my partner for always being there for me to complain to and sry for always venting my anger on u by throwing u harder.
Haiz, i hate Mr Khoo! Camillus's powerpoint was obviously added in wif advices by his dad who's a businessman. Mr Ghazali, my eng teacher had tricked us!!! He told us to include our advertisements and profits table in our marketing proposal and include more on our products in the powerpoint. That's wad i did but guess wad, Mr Khoo said it was all wrong... Every group except 1 which didn't pay attention to Ghazali's advices did the best lor. What an IRONY... Argh, summore the gay is in his group. Hope that my group wun be the worst.
Everyone is obviously taking me as a slave! Went to the science lab for this pratical which includes water and my other classmate had made a big mess of water there. When i went back to my bench, -that- guy had already taken another seat. The guy who was seating at that sit decided to just stand. Guess wad again, it was me who had to clean up! ME!!! Argh! Do they care abt my thoughts? K, only derrick do but after i finished clearing up. IPW- i did all the work and yet he complain. The profits table was there but he just go on to the next slide after a few seconds. And when we go back, he started BLAMING me! Giving the damn cold looks... Sigh, wad do other take me for?
I had enuf of this world... ~hoping to teleport to another world~
IcyRoy took a breath on 7/01/2004 08:34:00 PM